Analysis of first draft

Within my first draft there is a lot of key features that are missing, which are stopping my radio drama from being engaging and actually seeming like one.

The first thing that I have realised is that I am missing a jingle/ introductory music. Instead, my radio drama jumps straight into the dialogue which means that some people who are listening may not be aware of what is currently going on. Thus, this makes my radio drama unrecognisable which will not help my radio drama grow in the long run. In order to fix this, I will add a suitable introductory music in hopes to solve this problem.

Another thing that I had noticed is that the voices sound to be too close to the microphone. This was spotted straight away at 0:03 when the host says "people." This breaks any sense of verisimilitude, since we are divided with this unnatural wind sound. In order to fix this issue, I will make sure to either: re-record the line, lower the overall volume, or add a voice effect which could mask this sound. This will help to make the audience feel more connected with my host, making it more likely for the audience to finish the episode calmly.

Moreover, there is an absence of foley sound effects. I noticed that at moments like when Daniel is meant to be at the pub, it's hard to understand that since it doesn't sound like he is in that environment. Additionally, towards the end Daniel's voice is heard to be getting quieter as if he is leaving the room, although this is quite vague as we can't understand if it a mistake or if it is intentional. Therefore, I've decided that I am going to record some busy pub noises and foot steps in these areas, in hopes to anchor these meanings. Additionally, the cut between a flashback and flashforward is also very vague and I realised this when I was unable to sometimes tell a difference in the voices. Therefore, I will add a recognisable transition sound which will hopefully help guide my listeners.

And lastly, I believe that my radio drama requires some background music. Although this is not very common in many radio dramas, it is common in the docu-drama sub genre. By adding this to my radio drama, I hope that it will add a tense feeling to the atmosphere. Additionally, as mentioned before I will be able to subconsciously allow the audience to prepare for what they should expect, whether it's something serious or light-hearted.